The last couple weeks have worn on me... finally. I cracked and started to allow myself for just a moment let the stress of an oversized life, my business, my endless chore list,and my responsibility to a lot of people get the better of me. Only a moment though... because I don't have time for a full fledged adult meltdown these days!
NOT TODAY SATAN!! :)
I guess I am behind the curve for joining the world panic over the dreaded COVID-19 bug which has managed to sneak its way into everyones mind, city and 6ft lineup. It is hard to go about any part of life and feel its grip. I imagine my delayed response is because I have poured a lot of energy into making sure everyone in my circle is looked after and taking steps to make sure I have my own ducks in a row. Damage control!
This morning I woke up shaking yesterday's mute mood off... and I knew it called for something drastic to shock my system back in line! For the few that know me... my silence is not a good thing. So, I did what I do best... I looked for ways to help others. This technique I have affectionately coined "adult attitude alignment". Being a grown up means I have self adjust as Grandma isn't here to crack the whip and remind me to reset my 'tude. There is so much joy in giving! The worse my mood, the more I practice giving! its a science... one small gesture smacks fear and negativity in the face! Then a second and voila... positivity snowball!
SO... with my Grandma and her magical ways of loving people on my mind I got busy! I purposefully blasted her favourite gospel music all day, and I tuned in and listened to the generation that has shaped my old soul. I was reminded of their tenacity and also the wisdom in the faith they had in so many uncertain times. My Grandma was a pro at lifting people up, sharing her faith and the LOVE in her heart for people old, young and in-between. I miss her everyday, especially days like these ones.
My Grandma set a high bar in her examples.
So, my first stop was Dollarma for the cheer necessities! and then I was off to execute my surprise delivery for my most special person, Annie. For 98 years this woman has been a beacon of light and 36 of those years she been my GREAT AUNT! I wanted her and all the residents and staff to have a smile today. I learned infinitely from the example set my Grandparents and sweet Annie. Her happiness is my happiness! Seeing her big smile, her wave from the window and her excitement was rocket fuel. This is what life is about! Chase away the fear by leaning into kindness! The negative feelings that hang in the air run like the wind when love shows up.
Today was a mix of happiness, laughs, frustration and emotional management! I flooded my ears, my eyes and my mind with what I know works any time I start feeling stressed out. I hit the timeout button and I do the thing I am feeling least like doing. Why? because it forces perspective, it pushes me past the moment of a feeling. All feelings are passing, some stay longer than their welcome! SO, all the more reason to attack that like I would COVID itself!
Grandma always knew best, she had a lot of years under her belt and to this day she guides me, teaches me and reminds the importance of love and loving people, not just "my people". I was blessed to have their love and Annie's as the lamp post in my life. It is because of the lessons taught, my experience and general stubbornness that I will bravely smile in the face of adversity! Last time I checked... the only successful grumpy anything was a cat!
Positivity ... is also contagious! In difficult times it is really all we have all got! There is always so much to be grateful for even in tough times. Today, I leaned into what I have been taught like a life raft. I refuse to swept down stream! I refuse to give into fear. I will continue to try to keep my family, staff and strangers that cross my path on the right side of the pandemonium fence. We all are facing a varying degree of stress and pressure each day. When fear comes knocking... throw some goodness in the face of fear and run the other way!
Wherever you are today... lean into love's broad shoulders when uncertainty of life gets the better of you. Take a deep breath and smile because all days even the ones that test you are just as important as the sunshine days of life on easy street!
-Marina
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