When I was faced with the decision to take on the job of raising my siblings they were all under 10 years old. I remember for a long time feeling as though I didn't have a choice. I felt like my choice was stolen away by what was happening to us and around us.
It took me a while and a lot of running in the dark but eventually I came to accept that in fact I did choose them and had to learn to let go of loss and repurpose my grief to change my mindset of loss to what I gained by reaching for them. Easier said than done of course.
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If I had ended up with the life I thought I wanted — the one I was working for, the relationship and marriage and family of my own, I wouldn’t be here, and you can't be in two places at once. My story wouldn’t be the key to what I truly love to do. I love to help people and I love to take care of those that are hurting even if it means we are all lumped into one big sad heap! I am doing what I was designed and created to do. This crazy life is my earthly purpose.
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Now that doesn't mean there were not plenty of days I wanted to throw the towel in, of course, there were lots of those. This life looks nothing like the one I had, but I would not trade it or do it differently.
My big 5 whys are the faces you see here on this page. These Five awesome, kind, funny and unique kids are my siblings. Each of them who brought into this world to teach me as much I hope I am teaching them. This decade has further taught me grace, compassion, patience (at times in short supply), and exactly how strong my determination to succeed in this is. I’m sure that if this was easy I’d probably be bored!
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I have always been a diligent sort but this path has called upon me to level up in countless ways and each time when I thought I had given enough, the bar was raised, and each time I felt like I was back at the bottom of the hill. The lesson here for me is that life will keep knocking at your door and unraveling your plans because it is nudging to reach for something greater... your purpose, your WHY.
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The greatest place to find yourself is in the last place you'd look! When life challenges your WHY, lean into its pull. There may be a bumpy road for a while but when the dust settles and you see the path forged there’s no better feeling. Very grateful for my 5 why's and to be here pressing onwards. I have learned a lot from raising FIVE kids to being a female entrepreneur and I will continue to advocate for all children being raised in care situations.
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Thank you for joining us and sharing this story. One person cannot change the world but if we work together anything is possible! Much love and gratitude to each of you for choosing to be here and support this blog page.
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Look forward to hearing from you!
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-Marina
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